Tag Archives: Love

The Mysterious Month of Me – Facing Birthday Doubts

The Mysterious Month of Me – Facing Birthday Doubts

The Mysterious Month of Me

I don’t think I’ve ever had a month go by as fast as March has this year. The 1st fatherly Month of Me is complete and it has been one of extreme introspection. I’m trying to figure life out now without snapping at folks or losing my mind. The responsibility of fatherhood weighs on everything I do. Every time I look I’m my son’s eyes I’m dedicated that much more to not give up. Yet and still life is dead set on pushing me to my “adulting” limits. The juggling of family, finances, and feelings can get very tricky.

March does always remind me of a number of standout individuals in my life. I’m thankful for those people and the overall community that stands with me. The emotional pick me ups are clutch at a time when I’m battling serious feelings of inadequacy. The thing is, life doesn’t always provide a guy the outlet to release in the manner needed. I’m approaching a year since I left New Rochelle and so much has changed within me.

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I’m attempting not to hold so much inside but that is part of who I am at times. I’m trying to still be true to me in a world that wants my skills and talents but wants it in a different package. The emotions of life and daily economics clash often. It’s a puzzle I’m still working on. All the while Max gets bigger, smarter, more aware…….his Daddy’s story is an interesting one to say the least, but it’s still in its’ opening chapters.

As a new phase of this parenting operation approaches, I look forward to life presenting more opportunities. I also expect life to continue fighting me at every turn. Nothing worth having comes easy. I’ve slowly made moves to reestablish elements of life that make me full like my old self. The evolution of me, the progressive work of Jason continues and I’m looking to let Love, Faith & Family drive me forward.

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SAMURAI SIT DOWN W/ HIP HOP PUBLICIST SANDRINE AKA DRINEEE “THE HOPE DEALER”

SAMURAI SIT DOWN W/ HIP HOP PUBLICIST SANDRINE AKA DRINEEE “THE HOPE DEALER”

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It’s been a while since I last interviewed someone so its with great pleasure that I share this latest edition of Samurai Sitdown. I’ve always been about shining light on good people doing work that you may not be ever of or just good people in general. We need a lot more positive energy in these crazy times and this woman’s constant flow of hope filled, encouraging words in the midst of her steady Hip Hop representation are one of the things I look forward to while navigating these Internets. A jewel that’s been tucked away in the Dirty South, let me introduce you to Texas’s own Ms Sandrine.

A video posted by sandrine ✨ (@drineee) on

Can you please introduce yourself and tell us what you do? 

My name is Sandrine, also known as Drine, or Drineee on all social media platforms for all intents and purposes lol.  I’d like to say I wear many hats, or at least I try to anyway. Since 2011 I’ve transitioned from hip-hop journalist, to record label marketing rep to publicist. Oh, I’m also in finance as well.

It’s a pleasure to finally chop it up with you. Thank you for you time and lets hop right into things. Proper representation of culture and self are a big issue in many spaces right now. What does culture mean to you? In terms of Hip Hop, Nationality and Region?

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Hip Hop culture is one the most powerful forces in our society, period.  It started as a creative outlet and has turned into something way bigger than I think anyone could imagine.  When we saw politicians worrying about what 2Pac had to say, I think that’s when it really resonated that this was way deeper than rap. It’s more than music, it’s a way of life.  There are so many layers to it and I think that’s why we love it so much. 

True. That’s why we love it and why so many before us hate and fear it.

There’s a song for hustling, for your mama, for the come up, for love, for death and for everything else and the best part – it’s all genuine.  It’s easy to make a pop hit but it lasts a year, if that, and if they’re lucky, maybe some years because really, they aren’t talking about shit. When you make music with meaning it’s always going to outlast music for the moment.  

Continue reading SAMURAI SIT DOWN W/ HIP HOP PUBLICIST SANDRINE AKA DRINEEE “THE HOPE DEALER”

Why Would My Husband Unfriend Me on Facebook?

Why Would My Husband Unfriend Me on Facebook?

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I was recently presented with an interesting question. A reader wanted to know why her husband would unfriend her on Facebook. I had to take a moment to process this. It’s actually much more complex than it initially sounds. This could range from being a simple non-issue to being a true problem. With the limited details I have let me give you the best possible explanation for this act from both the positive and negative view points.

Let’s look at the negative possibilities first because realistically that is most likely what is running through your head.

Why would a man unfriend his wife on Facebook?
That could be a means to filter you out of his communications and interactions with other people. Generally speaking the presence of a wife on your social network shuts down a lot of the outside chatter you’re going to have with those of the opposite sex. If this man’s motives are not in the right place then this is either a means to engage with new people going forward or to hide something that may have been already happening.

Then we have the positive side of the coin. Depending upon the type of online interactions you have this may be a means of keeping people out of your business. Also, I’m assuming you live with your husband. You wake up together, go about your business and end the day together. There’s nothing wrong with allowing a degree of space between you. Marriage doesn’t make you Siamese twins. I personally keep my love off the Internets so I get this type of view-point.

In the end, the unfriending clearly has a motive behind it. Discovering if it’s sinister or protective is on you to find out by discussing it with your partner. Clearly you were friends on FB prior so ask what your husband’s view of Facebook is now that you are married. Stop and think on his activity and behavior during the course of your relationship. Has he given you reason to be suspicious of him or has he always been a private person? There’s definitely reason to check the status of things. I want to believe that if you guys are married that your relationship is in a good place. Many of today’s top mainstream Hip Hop artists speak frequently of “side chicks” and this mentality worries many ladies, but please remember, social media doesn’t end relationships. Social media simply magnifies what is already there.

A Lesson In Self Care: Don’t Let Love Become A Liability

A Lesson In Self Care: Don’t Let Love Become A Liability

 

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We’ve been taught that Love connects to all things grand and amazing. When it first happens it changes the way you look at life and connect to people. As you grow up the function and importance of love changes and expands. It goes from love of family and friends to romantic attraction laced emotions.

For me, love is the great divide and it’s a connection that in many ways will never disappear. Once you’ve earned my love you have it. Now here’s where the life lesson comes into place. For the majority of my life I’ve allowed love to double as an indefinite get out of jail free card for people.  What I struggled with was the concept that someone I held in high personal regard could still do hurtful things and not reciprocate the investment being made in the relationship.

Various situations have led me to now accept the reality that if you can not disconnect feelings from actions, love can become a very restrictive, self damaging thing. I do not question the love that was and give the benefit of the doubt that it still exists today but love changes and evolves like anything else. Sometimes love exists in the present primarily because of the history and foundation it was built on, and not the actions taking place today.

When you operate from a “treat people how you want to be treated” belief it’s difficult to separate actions and emotions. Yet nothing in this world speaks louder and more true then actions. Love in its purest form is equally a balance of what you feel and how you express those feelings.  It’s hurt when that balance isn’t there from folk that really matter to you but you reach a point of acceptance that things in life change. The changes may not make sense to you and you may not know what set that change in motion but yesterday and today are distinctively different. The sooner you acknowledge this and accept it the better you’ll be. Don’t miss what the future has in store for you because you were chasing that good old feeling you once knew.

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Street Drama 101: All Criminal Masterminds Are Suckers For Love

Street Drama 101: All Criminal Masterminds Are Suckers For Love

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I’m a fan of the Starz original series Power. The tale of Ghost, a street hustler trying to walk the line between criminal success and being an honest citizen has me hooked. This nation has always loved gangsters. We’re drawn to the idea of winning by breaking the rules, so like the many stories before it we watch Power deep down rooting for the bad guys. Unfortunately, like Tony “Scarface” Montana (with his sister) or Casino’s Frank Rothstein (with his wife), Ghost’s fate has been sealed by an ill-fated reunion with his childhood sweet heart Angela. Another genius of the streets with a fatal female weakness. How many times have we seen this story?

Beyond that, this level of insanely blinding  love/lust flies right in the face of the plot facts these stories presented to set up the lead character. I also can’t help but think it does a greater disservice to the viewer. Lets look a little deeper. From the biblical tales of Adam & Eve, Samson & Delilah and more we’ve been presented a repetitive theme of women being the source of male downfall. Time and time again men in highly advantageous positions see it all  turn to ash by trusting or caring too much for a woman.

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The number running brilliance of Sam”Ace” Rothstein couldn’t protecting from falling for the unstable “Ginger”.

 

The gimmick has gotten stale. Does it happen in life? Yes, there is folk who have let their infatuations lead them down the wrong path but it’s truthfully no more an issue then a woman who falls for a no good guy or any person that lets the lust for power and money corrupt his/her judgement. These classic plot devices just don’t hit with the sense of reality needed to really connect with the people.

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Tony Montana’s curious love for his sister led to his partners death and the fall of his empire

 

In the case of Power we are front row for both of the main characters Ghost and Tommy abandoning common sense after women enter their lives. That’s not even taking into account that Ghost is married with children. Both of these men violate basic street codes that have now put their entire empire in jeopardy from threats seen and unseen.

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Maybe the upcoming episodes and the already approved 3rd season of Power will provide the type of plot twist I crave but for the moment we’ve been served up another round of “whatever you do don’t trust those women” or “M.O.B” as the streets would put it. Women aren’t the enemy and while I know this is fictional entertainment I’d love to see a different outcome to what is shaping up to be another predictable fall from criminal greatness.

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SAMURAI SIT DOWN W/ RISING HIP HOP ARTIST NITTY SCOTT MC PT 2

SAMURAI SIT DOWN W/ RISING HIP HOP ARTIST NITTY SCOTT MC PT 2

 

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Welcome to part 2 of this special Samurai Sit Down with Nitty Scott MC. From personal insecurities and her relationship status we dive into some personal matters with the affectionately nicknamed #BaeGod so get comfy and enjoy.

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I saw you do your thing last year at the SOURCE360 lady’s night event at BAM. You seem very comfortable on the stage and on camera. Has that always been the case?

Thank you! I definitely think so. I practically grew up on stages: beauty pageants, talent shows, this game show on ABC Family, public speaking & poetry jams … I’ve done cheerleading and dance competitions, worked at Disney as a character performer … I’m just one of those people that loves to entertain and relate to people, say profound things, provoke feelings. It’s my calling.

Do you have any mentors in this game? Who do you turn that to to help direct your path?

Sort of! I’m a very independent little trailblazer at heart, so I rely on my own wisdom & instincts more than anything. But there are people here to help guide me when I need it, & others have dropped amazing gems on me along the way. I’d say 6th Sense, 88-Keys, Ski Beatz, Rah Digga and my boy Ace are always on call when I need some direction.

Hit the jump for the conclusion of  Samurai Sit Down: Nitty Scott MC

Continue reading SAMURAI SIT DOWN W/ RISING HIP HOP ARTIST NITTY SCOTT MC PT 2

Requiem For The Friendships That Were

 Requiem For The Friendships That Were

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Friend. What is that to you? How do you define it? Is it the same today as it was yesterday? Has it become better or perhaps its gotten worse? In many ways I feel it has simply gotten more real.

Friendship is no longer sealed by who you have drinks and hit the club with.  Life tests friendships in many ways and it’s rarely in a manner that is easily digestible for us. We have our rules that we claim to stand for. Many of us have codes that we live by but these all get put to the fire at some point. Friendship at its core is about what you give to another and what they give to you in a mutual relationship that improves both of your lives. That give and take will fluctuate over time but it should still be a balance. Should be, but I understand that will often not be the case.

Through trial and much error I have learned that the human concern for self can and will trump what a friendship should be. That is what adulthood has shown me. Logic is relative. Respect is applied when it is in people’s best interest. This sounds horrible but it is a reality I’ve excepted. The truth is that the company I keep, the people I associate with are at an age where who and what they are is pretty much set. We all grow and evolve but the true core of people is pretty much set. That means that when a difference of perspectives occurs the likelihood of changing their view is low. This is why I don’t attempt to change minds. If our core beliefs really don’t link up at this point then that’s fine. That is the way it must be.

This is what has resulted in the end of friendships as I know them. No one likes to admit error. In the best situations when we realize we’re wrong we should own it and apologize to the people we’ve hurt because that’s what adults do. Unfortunately many aim to avoid this. Instead we create our own rationales for what is happening around us. I accept that too. All I look to do now is make sure the error is identified and acknowledged. If you want to lie to yourself and others to create a perception of “being right” go ahead but YOU AND ME will know what the truth is. What others do after that point is on them. If the ability to show humility for the sake of our friendship isn’t the natural course of action then it is what it is we were never truly friends to begin with.

I’ve got about a 1/2 dozen instances in the past month or so that fall into this category and a such I also have to look at the role I’ve played in this friendships going the way they have. I see patterns in myself that I need to change to avoid creating the sense of entitlement undeserving people have felt.

While this all sounds like doom and gloom the truth is I am in great spirits because as god clears my plate of excess I am being shown the power of true love, friendship and support. When folk act out of character towards me my feelings are no different than many others. I often want to lash back out at them but I always pause. The energy to get revenge is rarely worth it. I have too many great people in my life that ACTIVELY show they care to let the malcontents get the spotlight.

I feel that one of the greatest elements of living life is how you treat other people. I’m far from perfect but I  can sleep well knowing what I’ve done and how I conduct my self. Thank you to the people who have made the decision to have me in their life. To those that feel they are better off sans Jason, I hope it was worth it. Sleep well.

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ASK A BLACK MAN SEASON 2 #DATING EPISODE – [SAMURAI EXTENSION]

ASK A BLACK MAN SEASON 2 #DATING EPISODE – [SAMURAI EXTENSION]

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After a heated opening week with some controversial subject matter and unexpected twists we jump into the 2nd week of #AskABlackMan Season 2. This week the panel is chopping it up on the subject of dating. Pet Peeves, personal wants and more are on deck as the cat and mouse games getting broken down from a male perspective.

You know how I do so check out the newest Ask a Black Man material after the jump and I’ll be here with an update afterwards with my own take on the matter. Feel free to ask questions too.

Continue reading ASK A BLACK MAN SEASON 2 #DATING EPISODE – [SAMURAI EXTENSION]

Rambling At 2am…..

Rambling At 2am…..

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Another night concludes. An evening of networking and supporting the moves and ambitions of my peers. Growing business men, lady leaders of up and coming brands surround me. People come up to me and ask me “Are you???” Slowly but steadily my work is proceeding me. I have many more miles before I can rest but I’m making progress.

Yet in the midst of these moments there is pain, frustration and hurt. My relationships mean the world to me and recently I’ve seen quite a few crumble or slowly deteriorate into a shell of their former selves. While I foster stand ties with new people and I grow with a Nomadic army behind me there is something missing. I miss my people. There are those that for the better part of life have made life a happier existence for me. Now they are not here and what truly tears at me is that I seem to be the only that cares.

My father is my role model. He has friends but for as far back as I could remember friends were never a dominant concern. He saw folk at holiday BBQ’s, company bowling nights but all that truly mattered was family. Maybe that’s what I need to progress too. The fact that I can feel so torn over not seeing and interacting with people can’t be good. I know I’m far from perfect but as I look at the things I’ve done, the loyalty I have maintained even as others have slandered me, put their egos and wants above my feelings, I’ve never violated. I sit on a mountain of skulls from all the secrets and skeletons folk have entrusted me with. Not once have I tossed one of these out into the public out of spite. That’s just not how I ‘m built.

Even now I look about my room and see reminders of the love lost, the friendships fading and written reminders to myself “Be Heard in Silence”. My focus shifts now. If my hurt is simply chalked up to things changing then so be it. Folk will always be what they want.

I’ve learned that age and maturity aren’t about bringing an end to pain. It’s really about being able to better handle it.

I love my people. I love with all my heart but when it’s not mutual change will come. I deserve better so I guess I have to snatch it.

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ASK A BLACK MAN SEASON 2 #MANHOOD EPISODE – [SAMURAI EXTENSION]

ASK A BLACK MAN SEASON 2 #MANHOOD EPISODE – [SAMURAI EXTENSION]

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The time is upon us for more male insights and reflection on life as the people at Madame Noire bring us the second season of their #AskABlackMan series. I had the pleasure of being a part of this production and will be featured cast member later in the season. My episode had its own theme but I love the other topics that were presented in the other episodes so I’m presenting Ask A Black Man – Samurai Extension.

Following the release of new Ask A Black Man clips I’ll drop the Samurai Extension so I can share my thoughts and answers to the respective questions that episode presented.

So here we go. Hit the jump for the 1st Episode of Season -#Manhood and my Answers on the topic!!!

Continue reading ASK A BLACK MAN SEASON 2 #MANHOOD EPISODE – [SAMURAI EXTENSION]