What Are The Limits of Your Loyalty When Attention is Lacking?

What Are The Limits of Your Loyalty When Attention is Lacking?


If there’s one thing these Internets don’t suffer from it’s a lack of relationship “experts”. As I navigate around your daily “Top 75 things men do wrong in relationships” post, I also try to avoid your regularly circulated flawed meme. The other day I came across something that sparked a little conversation. The Meme said “While you’re not texting her someone else is making her smile.” I had to laugh at the attention starved mind state behind this. As is often the case, the commentary within meme’s can be devoid of context. As such, people look at them as general across the board rules for every and all situations.

Lets be clear, this theme of “someone else” isn’t new. It’s been expressed in many other forms and other wordings. I always wonder who these passive aggressive threats actually work on . So, let me get this straight, if you dont get the attention you want when you want it you’re next course of action is to get it from someone else? Ok, how about I save you the time and let you go find this other guy now? If we’re truly within a mature relationship you mentioning the potential advances of other men only goes to make you look bad not scare me into submission.

With that said there is a layer of legitimacy to the original message. Everyone wants attention. One of the core reasons you’re in a relationship with a person is the attention from them to you and visa versa. People have differing levels of how much they can take when in the “not getting enough attention” department. You also have to take into account the reason behind the lack of attention. Is this someone laying around doing nothing who elects not to be with you more? Is this a seriously busy person who’s schedule lacks much free time? Do they text you often and show remorse for not having more free time? Are the moments that you do have together worth the many more you have to spend with yourself. There are a number of questions to consider on this matter. If you’re reaction to this issue is to get attention from another person then do yourself the favor and end the present relationship first. Everyone’s priorities vary and believe it or not, sometimes the relationship isn’t the most important thing to a person.

What matters most to you when it comes to attention? Ideally how much do you need? How long can you do without it before a change has to take place?

Jason Francis | The Social Media Samurai